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Whorse Race?

Carpet Baggage?

The race for Daniel Patrick Moynihan's vacated New York state Senate seat may more aptly be called, " The whorse race with no name ". Democrat Representitive Nita Lowey, of the fourteenth district in New York, would have been the natural choice for a female candidate, but lately, the media has been jerking us all off in creating a non-event phoney story about the current First Lady, Hillary Clinton, running for the office? Have you ever heard anything so ludicrous in all your life? Yeah, just about as crazy as the prospect that Democrat Representitive Jerrold Nadler of New York, would even fit in a Senate seat.

Well, anyhow, the latest pseudo-story created by the extreme left wing news media, to keep their precious First Family in the limelight, is still making the rounds. This contrived story, and it's ridiculous amount of coverage, makes me want to throw up. If the Hillary beast is running, it should just declare that it is now and get it over with, if not, it should clarify that as well. I bet, even Nita Lowey wishes her near future was a little bit more clear, also.

Anyhow, if Hillary were to run, she would be annihilated by whatever Republican who was to oppose her in the race. No matter how much the socialists inhabiting the far left wing of the Democrat party want to see Hillary in the Senate, it just isn't going to happen.

I mean Hillary has more baggage than an airport full of sold-out jumbo jets; and it's not all carpet baggage either. If she really is stupid enough to run, she is going to have some 'splaining to do! Some of the issues or matters that have not been addressed by Hillary, or the White House spinmeisters, include, not in any particular order of importance:

1) Carpet Bagger. Hillary was from Chicago, Illinois and moved to Little Rock, Arkansas. This is a far cry from New York City, or New York State, for that matter. This extreme instance of carpet baggery, is sort of like the old television sitcom, " Green Acres ", turned upside down, backwards, and inside out? It only could work because New York has the most relaxed residency requirement since they invented Ex-Lax.

2) 60s Liberal. Her extreme left wing socialist leanings will alienate all but the most staunch card-carrying ACLU members, Fabian Society socialists and Jane Fonda-esque communists. For example, though the newly elected Democrat Senator Charles Schumer is no conservative, he had to hide his true liberal colors from the voters to win his election. Hillary literally believes that the government can solve any and all your problems!

3) Never held an elected office before. Hillary has only pulled Bill's puppet strings and made sleazy back room deals. She is not experienced in legislating and compromise. Most politicians start at the state level to gain some experience before running for Federal office.

4) Bitter pill? Oh yeah, how about those questions about her failed socialized medicine plan that smacked of more cronyism than Tammany Hall? Remember how the plan was done in secret with Ira Magaziner and featured government contracts for the companies of every Clinton friend and/or donor except maybe Tyson Chicken and Moktar Riady.

5) Travelgate. There may not be any indictments happening, but the obvious inuendo involved in the cronyism of firing a group of carreer civil servants in favor of bringing in your amateurism local Little Rock buddies as repayment for services rendered during the campaign, is seedy and dark.

6) Crooked lawyer? Imagine old Hillary trying to dodge questions about her involvement in Whitewater/Castle Grande, especially after those billing records surfaced after they had been under subpoena for months ( years? ). What those records do show, is that she was the lawyer of record in a transaction that was declared a straw-man sham deal. What the mysterious appearence of the files shows, is that Hillary tells the truth just about as much as Bill does. Okay, so what were we supposed to think we were going to get out of a crooked small town lawyer, but a pack of lies?

7) Pro-Palestinian views. Hillary totally blew any chance at getting elected when she went on record as supporting the establishment of a Palestinian state. This one was really foot-in-mouth disease. I remember the White House going out of it's way to put some distance between it and this gaff. What do you think they would be talking about at those Jewish delis, huh?

8) The woman scorned. Hillary will cease being the pityful creature who was cheated on by her philandering adulterous husband and become an enabler, who must answer just when and where she knew her husband was chasing every skirt that came into his office.

I have my doubts about the Clinton family making a serious run for the Senate in New York. I find it easier to believe, if there really is a campaign, that the Clinton's are only campaigning to squirrel away some of their contribution bucks in some secret numbered Swiss bank account?

- Bongo ( Whip it good? )


Opinions expressed here are those of the individuals themselves; and may not necessarily reflect those of BONGO'S FALLOUT SHELTER.

Duck and cover...
Updated ( 6-3-99 )
(c)1999 Bongo.

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