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This Week's Defaced And Depressed?

Mercifully, Clinton's scandals were not the main subject of the Sunday broadcast news opinion shows, and the usual Whitehouse spinmeisters were absent.

Netanyahu was interviewed by Tim Russert. The Israeli Prime Minister refused to comment on Clinton's leadership qualities, but did hint that he was suckered by the President, in regard to the possible release of the convicted American citizen spy, Pollard.

Christine Whitman called for Clinton to resign and illustrated her main difference with Democrats by saying, " don't have big government make all the decisions ". Jesse Jackson ( her opposite number on one program ) preached the extension of anti-hate laws to women, gays and lesbians and chastised the " media focus on sex ". Of the much ballyhooed Mideast peace interim agreement, Jackson said, it was " one of Clinton's finest hours ". Is that what the British said of Neville Chamberlain, when he returned from negotiations with Hitler? The Roy Romer Robot repeated the DNC spin line, that the Democrats were trying to help health care and education, while the Republicans were trying to kill it. He also declared that the Democrats will be making gains in Congressional seats, on November 3rd? Gary Bauer quietly pointed out that the, " Clinton years have been a disaster for the country and Democrats ".

Interesting, was a face-off between James ( the mouth with no brain ) Carville and his wife, Mary Matalin; now there's an odd couple. Appearing on his birthday, Carville loudly ( does he know any other way? ) declared, " I don't like Ken Starr " - like we didn't already know that? He called him a " cigarette lawyer ", but hasn't he noticed the tobacco smell on Clinton's suit or the brownish green stains under Al Gore's finger nails? Mary countered with her distaste at how, in Carville's new ( not on the best seller list ) book, he had " taken a good man like Ken Starr and denegrated him ". In his raging lunatic manner, Carville posed this rhetorical question ( I hope it was rhetorical ), " Who has more integrity, King Hussein and Nelson Mandella, or Bill Bennett and Jerry Falwell?" Hey man, wasn't Hussein a former terrorist who sided with Saddam and Iraq in the Gulf war, and doesn't Mandella have like 3 wives? Last time I looked, no one was questioning the morality of Bennett or Falwell ( though you may not agree with them on the issues ). As the segment was ending and Carville was going off incoherently, Mary sang to James, " it's my birthday and I'll whine if I want to ".

John Linder and Martin Frost faced off. They both agreed that the coming election will " not be a referendum on Bill Clinton ". When asked about Clinton's comment in his state of the union address to " use 100 percent of the budget surplus to save Social Security ", Frost ducked the issue. Linder pointed out that during budget negotiations, the " President demanded 35 billion out of the Social Security surplus ".

Sandy Berger said of the Mideast interim peace accord, the " peace process is back on track, but by no means over, there will be set backs ", and the " CIA are not hall monitors ". Is he hinting that the agreement was a shallow one? Joe diGenova said, " If Clinton releases Pollard, his legacy will be; it's okay to lie and it's okay to spy ".

Bob Dole said that, " NATO is soft on Kosovo ", and urged that we not continue to be soft on Iraq and North Korea. He also opined, " The real outrage is in campaign finance, which, regrettably Janet Reno won't touch ".

Bob Kerrey said of the Democratic party, " We have truth and justice on our side ". But then he didn't attempt to correct George Will when he pointed out that Kerrey himself had previously said that, " the President was an unusually good liar ".

Lastly, the foot in mouth award goes to George Step-on-all-of-us, for volunteering this rhetorical question ( opinion ) on the possible release of Pollard to Israel, " what would be wrong with turning over the prisoner, as a sign of peace? ".

- Bongo ( Squares at the round table? )


Opinions expressed here are those of the individuals themselves; and may not necessarily reflect those of BONGO'S FALLOUT SHELTER.

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Updated ( 10-26-98 )
(c)1998 Bongo.