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Olson Won Kenobi versus Darth Boies

( or, Drop the lightsabres and grab your briefs? )

Monday December 11, 2000 the Supreme Court of The United States heard the case against continuing the skewed recount of ballots in Florida favoring Al Gore over George Bush ordered by the possibly ( yeah, right? ) biased Florida Supreme Court. The Supremes sent the last decision by the Florida Kangaroo Court right back to them like so much undeliverable mail, with orders to come up with something intelligable. Instead of responding to the federal court's order, they threw another questionable politically partisan so-called decision together which used the vacated elements as if the Supremes had never rejected it!

This crude attempt at starting the manufacture of Gore votes once again was stayed ( stopped in it's tracks ) Saturday, as the highest court in the land agreed to hear the case today ( George Bush and Dick Cheney versus Al Gore et al. ).

Theodore Olson represented the Bush campaign and began that the Florida Supreme Court, " authorized the recounts "... " without standards ". For anybody lost in the woods for two weeks, this means that one county would only count ballots which were punched completely through while others counted indented chad ballots with little or no indication of a vote at all ( unless ofcourse it was for their Boy Gore? ). Olson went on that it ( the Florida Kangaroo Court ), " expanded ", it's previous ruling after, " this court vacated and remanded it ". Olson argued that Florida statute, " requires the Secretary of State to set up clear standards ". Quizzed by the justices on what he would consider the proper standards to count legal votes, Olson said, " Penetration of the ballot card would be required ". No dimples. pimples, dents or indentations of any kind would satisfy Olson!

Joe Klock, a Democrat attorney representing the Republican Secretary of State Katherine Harris, declared that, " 166 ( the section covering election challenges ) does have time limits ". He also offered, " In the contest section you have the December 12th deadline ". Asked about ballot counting standards, he replied, " You have to punch the chad through in the ballet ". He referred to the large picture and text instructions written clearly inside the balloting booth and made this plain clear statement, " The problem we have here is failure to follow instructions "!

David ' Darth ' Boies began, " Let me object..." I don't know if he thought he was being funny or if Larry Flynt has something on a justice or two, but I have just had about as much as I can take of Boies misleading, now you see and now you don't, brand of extremely questionable lawyering ( lying? ). Anyhow, he described the, " extent of the statutory deadline ", as a, " remedy to the situation "? He then whimpered, " The Florida decision is either a sham or so misguided..." I think Boies is finally coming over to the Bush side ( heavy laughter ); as I believe the FLORIDA KANGAROO COURT IS A PARTISAN SHAM? Additionally, Boies was asked about ballot counting standards, but he completely ignored the question and never addressed the issue. Down, Boies, DOWN!

Justice Scalia said, " Two different standards by two different counties; that's just not rational ". There was no response from David Boies.

Justice O'Conner asked, " Why isn't the standard the one the voters are instructed to follow, for goodness sake "? Boies changed the subject to an optical ballot case without answering.

Chief Justice Rehnquist pointed out that even the Florida Supreme Court saw the skewed nature of their recount of only Democrat districts, saying, " Out of fairness they ( Florida Supremes ) asked for a statewide recount ". Boies took it as a question, answering, " Yes "?

Olson rebutted, " The Florida Democrat party was asking for uniform standards on November 20th ".

Olson was interviewed after the proceedings and opined, " The one thing they kept coming back to was changing the rules ".

Arthur Miller, Harvard Law professor, thought two questions were the main concerns: 1) " Did the Florida Supreme Court change the law "? and 2) " Did the individual Florida counties have differing standards "?

I predict that the Supremes will support their order to vacate the two Florida so-called decisions and revert the certified Florida results to those after the second machine recount with the absentee ballots added. They will then order a complete manual recount of Florida using the standard of completely punched through ballot cards only ( as in the CLEAR intent of the voter? )!

- Bongo ( Trust the farce, pukes? )


Opinions expressed here are those of the individuals themselves; and may not necessarily reflect those of BONGO'S FALLOUT SHELTER.

Duck and cover...

Updated ( 12-11-2000 )
(c)2000 Bongo.

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