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Toxic Waste Dump?


One liners...predictions...heard a good one, lately...have one of your own?

" The spin, the whole spin, and nothing but the spin. " - House Majority Whip Tom Delay ( submitted by Bongo )

" I never had sexual relations with that woman, Miss Lewinsky. " - President Willam J. Clinton ( submitted by Bongo )

Hillary Clinton will not be impeached. - Bongo

To receive your official spin doctor degree, you must complete your internship at the DNC. - Bongo ( hey man, that rhymes )

" We vow to be the fairness cops. " - Rep. Maxine Waters ( submitted by Bongo )

Color is a pigment of your imagination. - The Psychedelic Man

Spin is a four-letter word. - The Watcher

It's the cover-up, stupid. - Bongo

" I don't read the polls; I read the Constitution. " - Representitive Tom DeLay ( submitted by The Watcher )

Is anyone else tired of seeing that Clinton lip biting routine? - Bongo ( yeah, I know it's not really a cool quote )

" If Ken Starr poured gasoline over his head and lighted it like a Vietnamese monk, the Whitehouse would say he did it for political reasons. " - Jonah Goldberg ( submitted by Bongo )

"They say that, in the final analysis, if it is discovered that Hillary was the brains behind the eight years of Trailerpark Madness, then we really did have a second Bush administration." - Bulldog

The Meaning of Life. Divide your estimated life span into your current bank account balance? - Bongo

I asked a man, " What is the bigger problem, apathy or ignorance? ". He replied, " I don't know and I don't care." - Ben Jones ( submitted by Bongo )

On February 13, 1999 I heard someone say, " If you don't stand for something, you will fall for anything ". I wonder who they were referring to? ( submitted by This )

The new good news for Republicans is that all white American males over forty have been found to prefer the younger Bush. Monica has already gone down in American history. - Bulldog

The next time you get caught lying, just use the same excuse that Bill Gates does: "That was Truth v1.0, it will be fixed in the next release." - The Cynical Optimist

If George Stephanopolis is John Dean, then Monica must be Deep Throat! - Bulldog

" Al Gore should not even take his shirts to a Chinese laundry. " - Margaret Carlson ( Submitted by Bongo )

The KLA; nine months ago they were on Bill Clinton's terrorist a/hole list, now they are Jeffersonian Democrats? - The Overmen.

" I have not told anyone to lie about ground troops, not a single time " - Laura Ingraham ( Submitted by Bongo )

Did you hear about the Melissa (macro) virus ? It was written in Microsoft Virus Basic. Oops, I mean Visual Basic. -The Cynical Optimist

Bill Clinton is the Great Piecemaker. -The Watcher

Doesn't Hillary Clinton look like the little dog with the bobbing head in the back window of the car, when she nods her head? The way she does it all the time, I think we now know why Bill married her! - Bongo

The Clinton Doctrine is: A cruise missile a day...keeps the scandal away. - Bongo

If God didn't want us to litter, why did he invent packaging for products, or roads to toss the litter on? - The Cynical Optimist

If God didn't want us to lie, why did he invent politicians? - The Cynical Optimist

If God had wanted us to think, why did he invent televangelists? - The Cynical Optimist

If God didn't want us to think, why did he give us a brain? - The Cynical Optimist

Democracy is two wolves and a duck voting on what is for lunch. - C-Span caller on the conservative line, 9/14/99

I've learned not to put things in my mouth that are bad for me. - Monica Lewinsky's comment on a recent Larry King interview concerning her Jenny Craig weight loss ( Submitted by Bulldog ).

If this election winds up being decided on who got the most votes, then Bush will be President; if it is about who has the best lawyers, then maybe the Democrat Al Gore will win. - Representitive Steve Largent ( R ) of Oklahoma on November 9, 2000 ( Submitted by Bongo )

I gotta' give Third Strike Emmy Show host Ellen DeGenerate credit where credit is due; that line, " What could bother the Taliban more than a gay woman in a suit surrounded by Jews? ", was one in a million. THE REST OF THE PHONEY AWARDS SHOW STUNK ( remember, they nominate and vote on themselves: (E)chelon of i(MM)oralit(Y) Awards? ( 9-11-2000 ) )!

You may have a point there?

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Opinions expressed here are those of the individuals themselves; and may not necessarily reflect those of BONGO'S FALLOUT SHELTER.

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Updated ( 11-4-2001 )

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