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The Patient's Bill Of Goods?

The Senate Debates, S. 1344: The Patients Bill of Rights?

The Democrats have really been trying to " Wag The Dog " up themselves some campaign issues for the year 2000 elections, so they stalled all Senate legislation, through completely legal Senate means, in order to force debate on inserting a socialistic central governmental control over managed health care providers ( HMOs ). In the end, they would get a streamlined Republican version that addressed the issues they wanted to, but in a more conservative way, to preserve the state's right to better legislate for their own locales.

The debate would continue from July 12th thru July 15th, and the Democrats would have you believe that it was the Patient's Bill of Wrongs? Whichever side of the fence you may fall on this issue, for or against more Federal Government intrusion into our lives as citizens and states rights in general, the phoney debate on many of these Democrat amendments trying to create issues rather than answers, made the Senate look much like it's lower, House of Representitives*.

On the first day, Senator Phil Gramm ( R ) of Texas ( which, by the way, is one of the majority of states that currently regulates HMOs itself ), began, " They ( Democrats ) wanted to force everybody into a government run HMO ". Later he continued to knock HMOs in general, because they insert a bureaucrat into the medical profession chain of decision making, with, " With HMOs, they have a gatekeeper looking over their shoulder ". He got on the jazz ( for him ), with, " The way Senator Kennedy fixes the problem...he doesn't get rid of the HMO, he puts a bureaucrat in the operating room and he puts a lawyer in there to keep track of the HMO and the bureaucrat ". He declared, " They ( patients ) want the HMO out ". He once again attacked HMOs in general, with this rhetorical question, " Are we going to bring in a bureaucrat and a lawyer, or just get rid of the HMO gatekeeper? " He then did the old point-counter-point routine with, " Under the Kennedy plan, you cannot fire your doctor but you can sue him ", but, " We give people the right to fire their HMO...their doctor. We give people the right to control their own health care ". He then closed temporarily with another one, " Our bill provides more freedom; the right to buy a medical savings account ", but, " they think freedom is the right to sue ".

Edward Kennedy ( D ) holds up a chart that says, " Republican plan excludes more than one hundred million people ", and he declares that these allegedly uncovered persons, " they pay thirty to forty times higher premiums ". Now wait just a dog gone minute here, I wasn't born yesterday; but either way, whether I am on the high or low end of that supposed example, nobody could really be paying " thirty to forty times higher premiums ". Maybe Ted had a few on the way to the Capitol? Oh yeah, he had the audacity to say, " The Republican plan is the profit protection policy for the insurance industry ". Okay, Ted, I guess you don't count the trial lawyers, whom you are so beholden to!

Paul Wellstone ( D ) began innocently enough with the opinion that, people would like to " pay a little more to see the best expert ". Hey, this sounds viable to me. Wellstone then gets down, dirty and partisan, with, " The debate ia all about whether the Senate belongs to the insurance companies or the people ". This Democrat insurance company mantra is way out of line, because, if you remember, the Democrats created HMOs themeselves, twenty years ago!

Mike Enzi ( R ) jumped in there with both feet, " The minority came to the Senate floor and said they would hold up legislation unless we would debate the President's health care plan ". He continued to hit the Democrats in the face with reality, " Our bill respects state's rights...the President's is a one size fits all measure ". He had a portent for the upcoming debate, " The Democrat's stories will pull on the heart strings of everyone and attempt to strike fear in the hearts of the people ". He finished the segment with, " I remember the people's reactions to the 1993 Clinton-care plan, nationalizing or federalizing the nation's health care ".

By Thursday, the Senate had voted down all the homage to the trial lawyers disguised as Democrat Amendments, so the Democrats were doing the collective sour grapes whine. The pityful drone was best illustrated by John Kerry ( D ), saying, " I don't think there is any compromise in the air ". He then attacked Republicans, but claimed that he was " not being partisan "?

Kay Bailey Hutchison ( R ) began, " Every state in the union has some form of managed care regulation "; not a federal " one size fits all " program. She remarked, " They ( Democrats ) believe lawsuits are the answer to better health care ". She correctly pointed out that " mandating three hundred new laws would make the cost of health care go up ". She thought people should have coverage, " without having Washington look over everybody's shoulder ".

Dick Durbin mugged for the C-Span cameras, " My hat is off to the insurance company lobby ". I think he really meant to apologize to his own trial lawyer buddies for not giving them their money's worth?

Phil Gramm ( R ) on Thursday was an iron-man, anchoring the Republican effort to resist the Democrat dog and pony show, saying, " Our colleagues go on and on as if repeating something makes it true ". Yeah, baby; you tell 'em Phil!

John Edwards ( D ) Pinnochioed the DNC spin-mantra, " Insurance companies have won and American families have lost ". He really meant to say that the trial lawyers have lost and the American families have won?

Trent Lott ( R ), Senate Majority Leader, tried to reach out with, " Work with us, if you want to get something done ". Nobody on the other side took him up on his offer, because they really only wanted an issue, or to pay back their trial lawyer lobby contributors with a feint of debate? Lott announced, " The American people don't want the government taking over health care...they don't want a bureaucrat making the decisions ". He had the quote of the ( Thurs )day, when he described the Senate Democrats wanting to " place the scalpels of litagation into the hands of the trial lawyers ".

John Chaffee ( R ) pointed out that Clinton would undoubtedly be vetoing the legisation and added his own criticism of, " Could we have done a better job here? I think the answer is, we could have ". He did eventually vote for passage, though.

Bob Graham ( D ) called S. 1433, " The rubble of a collapsed bill under a presidential veto ".

Edward Kennedy came back from make-up, to buffoon once again, starting, " A little over twenty years ago..." It made we think of his amphibious automobile tests outside Martha's Vineyard. He warned, 'ala Arnold, " We may have a set-back tonight, but we will be back..."

John Ashcroft ( R ) thought that, " We have a great opportunity ", though it could be a victory for the status quo, as " Bill Clinton could veto it ".

For Tom Daschle ( D ), Senate Minority Leader, the big question was, " For the last twenty-four months, Democrats have worked for this moment; what should motivate this decision, medicine or money ". I think the real question on the motivation should have actually been between ' legislation ' or ' issue '. The Daschle Dog whined like a puppy that wants it's bone, listing the six lines ( uh, lies? ) that suited him the most, in utter defeat. First, he burbled that 1) Democrats would have covered one hundred sixty million people and 2) provide access no matter what. He then did number three like he was a gestalt of both comedian and straight-man, saying 3), " Doctors make decisions, not accountants; the Republicans defeated it ". He mumbled 4) that Democrats tried to " protect doctor patient relationships ", but failed to mention that they would be talking to their lawyers or getting increased malpractice insurance. 5) Five was a bit nonsequitor, but had to do with " accountability ", possibly the lawyer's bank account? In between some ramblings like, " We need more women in the Senate ", he coughed up the run-together point, with, " There are special needs of women that aren't being addressed here ". Hoping for some laughs later, he spouted, " HMO stands for Half Measures Only ". He had to end with the threat, " The President will veto this bill ". Oh, you are such a sweet, caring, non-partisan guy, Tom?

The final bill provided federal guidance where no state laws were already in place, not a strict federal mandate. But, where states didn't regulate managed health care providers, things like automatic emergency room coverage and OBGYN access as well as outlawing doctor gag clauses and providing arbitration for coverage disputes, were addressed.

The medical deformitiy pictures that the, Republican villifying, Democrats had to show in a puny effort to drudge up faux sympathy and demigogary, along with the ficitious charts with meaningless numbers, were a disgrace that even a liberal is going to have a hard time living down.

The bill eventually passed fifty-three to forty-seven, strictly along party line, proving that they never really wanted a bill passed. The Democrats got what they wanted, a campaign issue for all the DNC ilk, for the year 2000 election. Al Gore even got to have his own little sound bite; whining like a stuck pig, he declared that Clinton will veto the bill saying, " It is a fraud ". Good Al, not very convincing; now go away, preferably somewhere dark...

*The partisan fur was flying and the guano fanning out, as the BB gun bobsy twin was very more clown-like as a female Pinnochio with visual aids, than Senator-like ( how's that for Czechslifornia voters, huh? ).

- Bongo ( Give me more coverage? )


Opinions expressed here are those of the individuals themselves; and may not necessarily reflect those of BONGO'S FALLOUT SHELTER.

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Updated ( 7-15-99 )
(c)1999 Bongo.

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