Trying for the chip off the old potato(e) Dan Quayle award, Al Gore put his foot firmly in his mouth on Tuesday, when he claimed credit for creating the Internet. He was being asked to cite something to contrast him with another Democrat presidential candidate, retiring Senator Bill Bradley and said, " During my service in the United States Congress, I took the initiative in creating the Internet ". How does that shoe polish or toe jam taste Al? I mean he really wasn't joking ( though he really is a joke ). I guess after watching Bill Clinton lie over and over again about everything under the sun, he thought he would tell a real whopper and see how it went over with the people and the media!

I believe the Internet was created in 1969 by the Department of Defense and originally called ARPANET, when Al Gore was twenty one years old ( and obviously not yet even elected to Congress ). Okay, so maybe he didn't lie about this, but was just mistaken as he fathered the Internet before he ran for office? Yeah, just a simple mistake, really. Sorry Al, you just keep these gems coming and even the most liberal of tree-huggers will dump you for Bradley. Atleast Bill Bradley didn't claim to have created the NBA. " Dollar Bill " Bradley played in the National Basketball Association on the New York Knicks as a forward, before his election to the Senate ( for those living in caves, using a laptop and cellular phone to connect online ).

Well, Al baby should have found a different topic to begin his blatant Bill Clinton style campaign of ' lie, deny and stick to it ' with. Everyone knows already what a tree-hugging, left wing anti-technology geek he is. I mean this guy was preaching the evilness of the internal combustion engine just a short decade ago ( that's the thing in your boat, car or lawnmower, folks ). You just can't have it both ways, Al. But, I guess you have seen Bill Clinton get it both ways for so long, you figured you were entitled? We all know how much liberal Democrats love entitlements!

While the irrating laugh track at Gore's expense grew in volume, representitives for Gore contended that he did have a rightful claim, as they said he promoted the Internet and funding for it while in Congress. The problem with this, is that he said " create " and not " promote ". If you read this literally, any of the 500+ members of the House or 100 Senators could claim the very same thing. I guess Al just can't twist the English language the way his great living God/Pharaoh Bill Clinton can!

As the week went on, Republicans began to make fun of Gore's ridiculous claim. I still can't believe Gore pulled such a boner ( but he had heard that Clinton pulls on his boner and didn't want to be left out? ). As the humor level grew, Dick Armey reportedly said he created the national highway system and Trent Lott claimed responsibility for inventing the paper clip. The big difference between these two and Gore, was Armey and Lott were joking and Gore was seriously the joke!

Trying to salvage some semblence of intelligence or a sense of humor, Gore spokesman Chris Lehane only managed to illustrate the morally bankrupt and partisan nature of all that is DNC, when he said, " It's no surprise that Senator Lott and his fellow Republicans are taking credit for an invention that was created a long time ago. After all, they're the party whose ideas will take us back to the Dark Ages ". Just another case of foot in mouth disease happening here, compounding the original gaff ( lie ) with an attack in response to humor.

This is the kind of stuff that we have began to expect from the Democrats. The DNC has become the party of perjury and philandering. Now they are trying to add masochism to that list!

- Bongo ( You only managed to be pityful! )