What is sex? Sex is your gender.

No, not that man. What is having sex? Okay, I get it. How about, having sex is making love?

Making love is intercourse? Not exactly, or entirely, nor necessarily.

Having sex is sexual intercourse? Well, yes, or having sexual intercourse is having sex.

Is kissing, having sex? Kissing what? It?

Wait a second, oral sex is not sex. But you just said oral ' sex ', so it must be ' sex '?

No, no, no, sexual relations is sexual intercourse. So, does that mean a sexual relationship is made up of instances of intercourse?

Yeah, right, that's it. That explains everything.

Now that we have decided that oral sex is not sex, even though it has ' sex ' as part of it's linguistic definition ( you are weird, dude ); what about all those gay relationships out there. No sex involved with these people, huh?

Nope? That's what I thought. And the hookers out there, you aren't selling ' sex ' anymore.

AIDS? What's that? Foreplay?

But don't thank Clinton, thank your Senator.

- Bongo ( Strip golf isn't sex either. )